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A September Update

I have been putting off writing this for months. I planned to write a blog right after I returned home in January. Then I went back to work, and time just kept moving. Plus, I was uncertain what to write about. I made a huge decision (more on that to come) and that answered the question of where to start writing…and still I did not write. March came and the world changed.

On March 13th I had a full knee replacement and it was the last day that Colorado State University was open for “normal” operations due to Covid-19. While I focused on recovery, I watched in horror as the virus spread quickly around the world and particularly fast in the United States. My travel experiences felt a million miles away at that point, yet it had only been a few months. The world was so different, and still I did not write. I didn’t write because I was scared. I was scared that my life of adventure was over, and I was stuck back in a life of the same old routine’s day in and day out. The truth is I am still scared but I am ready to write.  

So, now it’s September and I am finally writing. Way back at the end of January I made the huge decision to resign as the Director of Campus Activities. I still loved doing the work and at the same time I knew in my heart it was time to move on. My resignation was effective on June 30, 2020. My plan was to cut way back on expenses, drive for Lyft and travel. Even better would be to find some work abroad. It seemed like a solid, if somewhat risky, plan in January. Then Covid-19 came along. Now it seemed like an awful plan. I knew that resigning was still the right thing to do but now I was scared…really scared. My supervisor at CSU offered me the opportunity to continue to do project work as an hourly employee. I am so grateful that this amazing opportunity was presented to me. I continue to do meaningful work for CSU with a flexible schedule while also pursuing other ideas for where my next adventure will take me.

Adventure #1: I am excited to facilitate 3 sessions regarding Diversity, Equity and Inclusion for the Location Indie community I have grown to love and cherish. This opportunity allows me to continue to pursue my passion regarding equity work while having the conversation in a space with fellow travelers and folks pursuing a location independent lifestyle.

Adventure #2: I have heard the saying that when one door closes another opens but I have never experienced it so directly as a I did recently. I was approached by Colin, the owner/operator of my favorite Fort Collins restaurant Jay’s Bistro, about becoming a partner in the business and leading some strategic thinking and event planning work for the bistro. I was so flattered to be asked that it took me awhile to realize I was also really excited about pursuing this new adventure. On August 3rd I officially started working for Jay’s. My first big project is creating and implementing a plan to develop a clearly articulated Vision, Mission and shared set of Values. I love this sort of work and getting to do this for Jay’s is a dream come true.  I plan to make a small investment in Jay’s meaning I will be an owner of a tiny piece of my favorite restaurant. It is a scary time in the restaurant world but I am confident that Jay’s will survive this current storm and thrive when we get to the other side. I am also designing ways to combine my love of travel with creating special events for Jay’s.

So, here I am without a full-time job doing some work at CSU that is familiar and I feel confident doing while simultaneously taking on exciting new challenges. Travel is still right there at the top of my list although I know right now is not the time to pursue that dream. So instead, I will reflect on my past travels, keep in touch with some of the amazing people I met along the way (you know who you are,) and make plans for how I can responsibly renter my life as a traveler when the time is right.

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Travel & Privilege

Writing the blog has been much harder since I have been in Asia. I have reflected and thought about this, but I think I have known from the beginning why it has been hard. 

I am much farther out of my comfort zone here. This part of the trip has stretched me as a traveler. The cultural differences have been stark beginning in Japan, and have continued to be significant in Vietnam, Mandalay and to a lesser extent Thailand. The things that have really kept me from wanting to write are being forced to more deeply examine my privilege and many times consider how I have internalized dominant beliefs about many of my identities. I have been socialized to believe these things and while that is not my fault, I do believe it is my responsibility to acknowledge my privilege and try to make positive change toward a more just and equitable world. 

In his book Privilege, Power and Difference, Allan G. Johnson defines social power as the “access to resources that enhance one’s chances of getting what one needs or influencing others in order to lead a comfortable, productive, and safe life.” He continues by defining privilege as “…the unequal way in which it [social power] is distributed and the effect it has on elevating some people over others.” I have been thinking a lot about things I have access to or are easy for me simply based on the social identity groups I belong to. 

Based on my identities, I experience a lot of privilege.  When I am travelling, I have realized there are new privileges I have not critically examined. In general, I experience white privilege, male & cisgender privilege, heteronormative privilege, class privilege, and many others. While traveling I have been made very aware of class privilege, having a United States passport, and the privilege of speaking English. A new privilege I probably would not have noticed outside of foreign travel is always being able to keep up with what is going on in the US. In most hotels I have found news channels in English that focus heavily on news from the US. No matter where I go, I never feel very far from what is going on in my home.

Long term travel has also challenged me to consider my privilege in some new ways and I am grateful for that. Most recently in Myanmar, I have been reflecting deeply about my class privilege. I saw a depth of poverty I have never experienced before. It is important to note that not seeing it in other places is also part of my privilege and it exists much closer to home. In many places, I can choose to move through the world and ignore significant poverty. In Myanmar it was unavoidable, and because of that I was able to think critically about my response. 

I noticed how easy it was to feel sorry for people and that is a response I am unsatisfied with. I am unsatisfied because I believe it is rooted in my internalized ideas that western capitalism is the best way to live and surely everyone would be better off living similarly to me. I also don’t think sympathy is a helpful response. My hope is to be empathetic and try to learn from the people I meet while traveling. 

The important questions I have been asking myself are what does this all mean to me and what is my responsibility to address my privilege? 

The first thing I will acknowledge is that I am still reflecting and processing much of this, so I don’t pretend to know all the answers. My first step to issues like this is always educating myself. While I know I will learn from the people I meet I cannot expect or demand that those who are oppressed educate me, this is just another form of oppression. I must find the resources and do the work myself and with other people who share my dominant identities in addition to learning from those I meet.

I must be willing to name when I am experiencing dissonance about something. This has been challenging when I am moving from place to place and almost always with new people. I don’t want to name things that make other travelers uncomfortable, but I do think it is important to find like-minded people who I can talk to and so far I have been fortunate to be able to do this. 

Some of the things I can do while traveling are the same as at home and some are new, for example:

-Not manspreading on a plane (thanks becky for the reminders)

-Not talking over women

-Recognizing when I am making assumptions about my western life being better than others and interrupting this thought process. This is very hard because the ideas I have internalized about US superiority run deep.  

-Buying local, as a tourist, this feels particularly important to leave money behind in the hands of local people. 

-Be thoughtful about how much physical space I take up. I have found this to be particularly true when using public transportation. 

-When I have the opportunity to talk to people from the country I am in, I can listen without judgment to hear their story from their perspective while recognizing they don’t owe me their story. 

-Read more about travel through the lens of social justice. There are many resources and I just have to choose to use them. 

-Researching organizations that are doing good work in the countries I visit and support them. For me, a primary resource has been micro-financing through Kiva. I have specifically been supporting women in countries around the world. 

I realize me doing these things will not change the world or end oppressive systems, but I also believe we all have a role to play in pursuing a more equitable world. 

I realize this post has been different from my past posts and, like always, I am open to feedback. I recognize this post may cause some discomfort for some of you and I am certainly open to that feedback as well. I do think discomfort is part of growth and I hope you will sit with the discomfort as well. 

I am currently working on a post about my cruise in Myanmar and a surprising and scary day in Thailand and my commitment is to continue to examine my privilege in future blogs.