Dear Jared: A Letter to My Son

This is post is being published with the permission of my son, Jared. Thanks for your support buddy.

Dear Jared,

I have been traveling now for nearly three months and I have a confession to make to you, son. Despite what I’ve said before, I didn’t set out on this journey just for myself.  It might sound strange, but one of the reasons I wanted to travel was actually for you. 

I set out on this trip to be a role model of doing what you want to do instead of settling, chasing your dreams instead of sitting still. I wanted to bring you along for some of my time traveling so you could experience a little of that feeling firsthand, and our time together in Croatia, Albania, and Greece has been a highlight for me. Now I hope you will follow your own dreams to travel somewhere your way on your terms.

While I’ve been traveling alone, I’ve had the time to reflect on some other things that I want to tell you about. The first one is that I hope you will travel your whole life. I hope you will start having these experiences now. I want to be careful not to put my dreams on you, but I know that you like to travel so I am basing this advice on that knowledge. 

Take every opportunity that comes your way to explore this world, whether it’s a new small town in Kansas, or somewhere in Lawrence you’ve never been, to an altogether different country like Laos. (I am so excited to discover Laos with you soon.) Go anywhere and everywhere in between. Get out and see what the Earth has to offer. There is so much there for you to discover.

Another thing I have recently realized is that right now, I am having a unique experience that allows me to take a step out of my normal life while still watching it unfold from a distance. This feels very different than times when I have changed jobs or moved to a new city. In those cases, I was very focused on the transition and what was coming next in that novel place. In my current situation, I know I will be coming back to my “normal” life in January, so I have a keen interest in what is going on while I am away. 

As I pay attention to what is going on back home, I have been reminded that I am not indispensable in any one facet of my life. Things move forward whether I am there and involved or not. The Campus Activities staff at CSU are gearing up for a new school year and doing a great job. You moved back to Lawrence and are ready for your new year as well. In some ways, this is a humbling recognition of my own mortality. In another sense, it has been very liberating. 

I have this one little life and knowing that the things I am involved with will go on with or without me has helped me finally understand that I don’t need to be motivated by obligation to others. This belief has been a hang-up for me much of my life. I want to please others, including you. While that is not a bad thing, it can sometimes become stifling and lead to a lot of self-doubts. This new awareness of my own mortality has been a great reminder that I want to do the things that bring me joy and maximize my time on this floating rock. Right now, that means seeing as much of the world as I possibly can, but also, encouraging you to do the same if it’s in your heart. 

The world is an amazing place and despite all else, we do live in a wonderful time for travel. Technology allows us to keep in touch with the people we love from all over the world. From what I have seen on my journey so far, it is a particularly good time to travel as a young person. So, if it will bring joy to your life, son—travel now. Don’t wait like I did. It is up to you. You are loved and you are supported no matter what, so be free to pursue your dreams and passions while knowing that DeeDee and I will always be in your corner. 

Love,
Poppy