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What I Have Learned Traveling

I am writing this on July 14, 2019. I left the US on June 2, so this makes today my 43rd day traveling. Time goes so fast. I have traveled solo for most of that and DeeDee, Jared, and our good friend Sara were my travel companions for over two weeks. During this time I have visited Albania, Croatia, and Greece and driven from border to border in Montenegro twice. I have spent a lot of time alone and I have also met wonderfully kind people. 

Along the way, I have learned a few keywords essential to getting around. In Albanian, faleminderit is thank you, and përshëndetje is hello. In Croatian, thank you is fala. I have also learned a lot about Albanian history but I’m sure I have only scratched the surface. It is a long and complicated history which only intrigues me more. For instance, the story of the Albanian hero Skanderbeg is so fascinating and the people are so proud of him. He was a military leader in the country when then sought their independence from the Ottoman Empire in the 1400’s. If you’d like to learn a little about Albanian culture and also enjoy good fiction, I suggest Broken April by Ismail Kadare. It is a dark and beautiful story about the traditions of Albania and reading it helped get me excited to make Albania my first stop.

After two weeks of nearly constant movement, I am currently house & pet sitting in Durrës, Albania and have a lot of downtime. I wanted to write this blog when I was a month into my travels, but the words were not coming to me. It has been a struggle to figure out how to share my experiences so far.

After three weeks of traveling alone, I was really excited to see DeeDee and Jared. I have said many times that one of the things we do best as a family is traveling together, and this trip just reinforced that belief. I am particularly grateful because I know that my time traveling with Jared will only be reduced as he gets older. Of course, even though there were times we got crabby with each other, like when Jared and I argued about politics until we were both mad—I would not trade one second of the time I had with them. With all of the bumps that come with family, the time we spent together was sacred and I know how fortunate I am that they could join me on this trip. 

At first, I was feeling stressed about not “keeping up” with my posts, but in hindsight, I realized that it was great to focus on our family time and not worry so much about the blog. That clarity has allowed me to reflect on why this post has been hard to write. I could sit here and easily list off things I’ve learned so far, but I wouldn’t find that so interesting and a list wouldn’t get to the heart of what I want to share. What I really want to get down to how I am making meaning of my travels. Really, this is what I hope all of my posts focus on in one way or another. 

Being Alone

I am an extrovert, and while I am much less of an extrovert than I was when I was twenty, I am still an outgoing, extroverted personality. I love to get outside to new places, meet people, connect with others, and hear their stories. This has been a huge part of my trip and surprisingly, sometimes really challenging. I want to go experience life with new people yet sometimes I am also drawn to staying in my room watching TV on my computer. My goal is to honor both of those things and not feel bad or judge myself when I spend a day doing nothing. I guess even extroverts need some downtime, and I’m learning that’s okay. As I sat in a cafe writing this The Lazy Song by Bruno Mars started playing…seemed like perfect timing. 

So far, I have been successful meeting people in two ways: in bars and online. I know it might sound cliché, but sitting at a bar is truly a great way to mingle with people, and I’m finding this holds true no matter where I go. When all else fails,  most bartenders are willing to chat and more often than not, they are quite interesting, full of unique perspectives and entertaining stories. I am grateful to have found a great bar in Tirana where I met the owner and hung out several times. If you ever go to Tirana and find yourself in need of a libation, pay a visit to Duff Sports Bar, ask for Ledion, and tell him Lance sent you. He will treat you right. 

The other way I have been meeting people is through Facebook and online introductions. I made a new friend this way, via an introduction from my friend Melia named Brian, and we hit it off so well that I asked him to write a guest post on the Albanian youth, one of the most fascinating topics we discussed. I met another travel blogger, Natalia, who I learned more about blogging and just general travel from and Christy who I am house sitting for through an Albanian Facebook group. Despite the many problems that come along with the internet and social media, it really does make the world a smaller, friendlier place. These tools make this a magical time to travel if you use your street smarts and learn how to maximize connections. 

To Plan or Not to Plan

Admittedly, I am not a great planner. I get some strange level of pride from not planning, and while I am sure some of this comes from insecurity, that is a topic for another time. The truth is forgoing plans fulfills this internal desire to be an adventurer and I find flying by the seat of my pants is definitely more adventurous than creating an itinerary with little to no leeway for exploration. Oddly enough, my travels so far have helped me realize that I do often need more of a plan than perhaps I like to readily admit. Without one, it becomes so easy to just stay in the room and not do much when I don’t have something on the calendar. That outcome ends up running contrary to the adventure I really want to have and that I believe a lack of planning allows, so I’ve been grappling with accepting that plans are more useful for facilitating adventures than I have given them credit for.

A wonderful outcome of this somewhat uncomfortable realization is that it has helped me see something back at home I have been missing for a long time: how much DeeDee’s planning makes my life better. Because planning doesn’t come naturally to me, I think I’ve been taking for granted the value that a structured plan provides. Thank you, DeeDee, and I apologize for not recognizing this sooner. 

All of these reflections and lessons so far have helped me make a decision that I think will really enhance my trip. I have decided to go to Switzerland on August 5th. I’ll be staying with a family and helping in their garden and around the house. I found this opportunity through Workaway and it has really given me something to focus on for the next leg of my travel adventure. It’s a bit of an experiment for me, and I feel that it’s a solid compromise between having a set plan and having no plan whatsoever. I’m going to test out this combination and see if it will give me the security and direction I appreciate having in a plan while also remaining open and flexible enough to satisfy my need for adventure. Either way, even creating a plan like this is an adventure for me, so we’ll see where the road leads! 

There is so much more meaning making I could share but for now, I just need to post this damn blog and start thinking about what to share next. Several folks have asked me how I chose Albania to start so I am considering that as a topic. If you have ideas, please share them with me. 

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Berat…I have no words

I wanted to write about Berat because I thought it was an amazing place. It is old…I think the oldest place I have ever been with the first known habitation being in the 6th Century BC. “Modern” Berat started in about 314 BC so it is only about 2400 years old. As I thought about what to write I realized that really I don’t have the words to explain Berat so instead, I will share it with you through pictures. I hope you enjoy.

  • Views of the nearby mountains

  • On each hill there are very old buildings that were part of castles
  • A Church in the hills
  • Not a bad place to stay

My favorite dinner was at Antigoni. The food was terrific but I think like the views better. Watching the sunset and the city change was fantastic. Oh, and the tomatoes in Albania are delicious! The main course was Berat Spitzel, cheese wrapped with meat and then fried…I don’t think it was good for me but it sure was yummy.

Have fun storming the castle…this hill is steep and long.
I should take a picture facing back down the hill. Alternate caption I am tired of walking up this damn hill and need a break.

The castle sits on the top of the big hill. After walking & walking & walking I got to the top and took some photos of the area.

One of my favorite days was going to Osumi Canyon and Bogova Waterfalls. We got to swim in both places which were amazing. The guide said the water at the waterfalls was 8 Celsius…I don’t know if that is true but it was cold. Swimming in the amazing canyon was much warmer.

Bogova Waterfalls
That was some cold water!
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Albanian Youth: Thoughts from Brian Gega

I realize that everything I experience in Albania is through my own lens and my own lived experience. In this blog, I want to share an essay written by my new Albanian friend Brian. I asked him to talk about young people in Albania and this is his truly insightful response.

Something is not rotten in the state of Albania and that is the youth of this country. I consider myself very fortunate to remain in contact with students even after finishing my university studies. In my first year as an adjunct professor in the Faculty of Foreign Languages University of Tirana and the Faculty of Dentistry in University of Medicine Tirana I have had the luck to teach some 200 students, chiefly freshmen. What really impressed in my first year of work is how incredible students are.

What I believe makes Albanian students incredible is their will and power to study hard and succeed despite disappointments and obstacles they face daily. I will start with politics, the number one cause of demotivation among young people and not only. According to a recent study by Civic Resistance NGO, the vast majority of young people see themselves distanced from political parties, where 80% of them are neither members nor activists of a political party. The same study also revealed that only 17% of young people trust in political parties. I consider this to be one of the greatest blessings with today’s young people: they are (almost) totally free from political affiliations and they know that it is hard work which will make them go places.

Another issue they face is the uncertainty over their future. Imagine entering a new chapter of your life, being full of hopes and positive energy about a bright future and then you get told by the older people that there is no hope, degrees are useless, when you finish your studies you will end up either unemployed or employed with a minimal wage? It is like people are trying to shatter your dreams before you even fall asleep. Yet, Albanian students keep a stiff upper lip. Disappointments and society’s negative energy are the CO2 that they turn into oxygen, the driving force to push for change. Albanian youth consider themselves as the ones who will shape Albanian of tomorrow. And they are right.

What else makes Albanian youth incredible? Despite their difficulties and misfortunes, they prevail. There are thousands of Albanian students studying abroad, chiefly through scholarships they have earned thanks to their intelligence and commitment. Others who conclude their academic studies in Albania are hired in European countries, chiefly Germany, and US. What’s most amazing is not the fact that they succeed in the country they emigrate but the fact that despite the high brain drain Albania has suffered in the recent years, it still manages to meet demand of specialist of the country. I believe that if there is one thing that Albania exports that is human resources. And we are very good at it.

All in all, I consider Albanian youth able to make outstanding things. They are intelligent, committed and disappointed enough to induce a real change to Albania and bring it closer to where it belongs: Europe and the West.

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Slowing Down

From what I have experienced so far, the pace of life in Albania is slower than I am used to. The one exception to this is when in a car, and then it seems very fast & furious. Other than that, people do things like sit in cafés for long periods of time having one coffee and casually chatting with friends. Many people seem to like just watching the world go by.

Seeing everyone taking their time at life inspired me, and I set out to get my head and face shaved. I have always wanted to get my face shaved with a straight edge razor by a barber but had never made time to do it. I found a small barber shop called The Gentlemen’s Den. The name freaked me out a bit, but things looked all right. The barber did not speak English though luckily someone there did. I scheduled a shave for the next day at 11:30.

I was not sure about the name of the place but I am so glad I took a chance.

The next morning, I was very excited to go in for the shave. I was a little late, but the barber was very understanding. We navigated our language barrier and I was confident he understood I wanted my head and face shaved.

After getting settled in the barber’s chair, he first covered my head with a generous amount of blue gel. He used a lot of it. However much you are thinking, it was even more than that. The cool gel felt cool which was so nice because it was a very hot day outside and immediately got me relaxed.

After that sat for a few moments, he wrapped my head with a hot towel. The contrast of brisk gel and hot steam was incredible. I could feel my hair follicles opening right up, and in a few minutes, they were ready for a serious shave. The barber loaded a new razor in his straight blade and started shaving away. I was loving it!

This is where things took a wonderful turn from great to amazing. After he was done with the blade, he then smoothed shaving cream all over my head which started a little tingle and mild but invigorating burning. This move wasn’t just refreshing, it was genius. After a couple minutes of this shaving cream treatment, he shaved my whole damn head again. He was meticulous.

At this point we had been there for quite some time and I thought maybe I had not been successful as I thought communicating that I wanted my faced shaved, too. Of course, seconds later, I saw I had no reason to worry. He grabbed a head rest, attached it to the chair, tipped me back, and gave my face the same outstanding double shave treatment. All I could think was, “What is happening here? How can I ever just have a normal shave again?”

After nearly 45 minutes, my first Albanian barbershop shaving experience was done. Now, those of you who know me will find this particularly funny because you know I don’t have a whole lot of hair. I gave him 1200 lek, plus what I hope was a generous tip, and went on my way, feeling brand new. I am not sure I have ever spent 45 minutes in a barber’s chair. In case you are keeping track, 1200 lek is about $12. Not bad for the best shave of my life!

My mirror selfie game is weak but I think you can tell I am happy.

I regularly move through life quickly. I often get told, “Wow, you look like you are in a hurry!” This happens even when I’m not particularly in any rush. Satisfying a lifelong wish for a barbershop straight edge razor shave was great on its own, but it also showed me that part of my journey is going to be learning how to slow down and pay more attention to the world.

After reclining back and giving my full attention to all those different sensations, I want all my stops in a barber’s chair to be 45 minutes of shaving bliss! I think, just maybe, if I slow down some in everyday life and look more closely at what’s around me, I can have some of that bliss outside the barbershop, too.

Clean and Fresh!
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Albania: My First Thoughts



I have finished my first week of travel and thought it would be a good idea to get some reflections down. I’m just getting used to being out on the road and finding my rhythm between exploring, reflecting, and blogging.

I will start with two things. The first is to come visit Albania. It is beautiful and there is a lot to see. My second thought is that I haven’t yet formed thoughts on Albania as a whole. I really only have thoughts on Tirana.

To me—and to be clear, this is through my lens and all that comes with that—Tirana feels like a young, vibrant, up-and-coming city. It is hectic and chaotic. When you walk around outside much of the city seems to be in disrepair. But when you go inside the buildings, many places are brand new with a fresh look. There are young people everywhere.

It feels like a big city with a lot of people living here, because it is. The population of Albania is 3 million, and a third of them live in Tirana and the surrounding metropolitan area. The traffic is wild, and you have to be extra cautious while crossing the street. Car horns are ever present. Later this month I am scheduled to rent a car. I am thinking of moving my pickup location to the airport to avoid driving in the city center because I don’t understand the local rules of the road.

I took the Tirana Free Walking Tour and the guide was so full of hope and energy. He studied history in college and shared a great understanding of where Albania has come from and a bright outlook on where it can go. While acknowledging their struggles he was optimistic about the future of the country. He was hopeful about becoming a member of the European Union and what that would mean for Albania. If you are in Tirana do this tour, you will love it.

Of course, there are lessons here of the things I take for granted. So far, I am reflecting on the advantages I have just by being born and living in the U.S. The main one that comes to mind is access to clean running water, yet I also fully recognize that not everyone in the U.S. has this. I have read mixed things about drinking the tap water here so as a precaution I am drinking bottled water. It is easy enough, but it does show me how I have always taken for granted that in my house I could turn on the water and presume it was safe. I want to do a better job of not taking these sorts of things for granted when I come home.

Another observation I have made is that I am more introverted than I usually am. One of my goals for travel is to meet and connect with people along the way, yet that has been harder than I thought. This has been a surprise and I will have to keep reflecting on why this is. Despite this, so far in my first week I did meet a traveler who has does the Something of Freedom blog and an Instagram page with 34 thousand followers that I found impressive. So far, I feel this first week of travel is off to a good start.

Enjoying a beer at Duff Sports Bar