The Thin Line

I am learning a good lesson this week… the line between gratitude and a bad attitude is very thin. By nature, I often lean toward the bad attitude.

I planned to write a blog on Sunday titled “One Week to Go and I Feel…” I was excited to compare how I was doing at one-week pre-trip versus my past writings at one month and two weeks out. It was going to be a nice wrap up to my pre-trip blogs.

Then, on Saturday we moved from a wonderful home with a lot of space that we had lived in for 12 years to a beautiful but much smaller condo. In preparation for the move we got rid of thousands of things—no exaggeration, we counted for a month.

This downsizing has its benefits, such as no exterior maintenance to worry about. This will make traveling and taking care of our home easier for years to come. The real challenge though is that it is MUCH smaller. Even after getting rid of so much we still have way too much stuff.

After two full days of unpacking the place is a mess, though progress is being made. We have the kitchen about 75% done and the master bedroom about 80% done. The garage is so full that I don’t know when we will be able to get a car in. The basement is a wreck and the main floor living area is in shambles.

So, I have been crabby. I have complained about how much stuff we have. I have been short with DeeDee and Jared and I have felt a constant state of overwhelm.

I keep asking myself why the hell are we moving one week before I leave? when I should be recognizing that we only put our house on the market on March 14th. Things quickly got busy and moved fast.

We sold our house, found and bought a condo, closed on both, and were able to move before I left for my trip—all of that in barely over two months. While I would not recommend to anyone moving the week before a 7-month trip, when I really pause to think about everything that’s happened, we are so fortunate. Everything worked out just right.

Despite all the stress of change getting to me and my mood, the thing is: I have so much to be grateful for. The line between gratitude and a poor attitude is so thin, and I want to practice gratitude.

I need to choose gratitude over complaining.

I need to choose gratitude over complaining.

I need to choose gratitude over complaining.

You probably get the point, but I am hoping by doing a little bit of “Bart Simpson writing on the chalkboard” I will actually listen and choose gratitude over complaining. That is my work from now until I leave on Sunday June 2nd: choose gratitude (in addition to some more unpacking).

I feel doubt right now that I will be good at it, but I am going to really try, because gratitude is what I truly want to feel. Feel free to remind me of this if I start falling into complaints.

In just four days, I will board an airplane to start a 7-month adventure that I know will change me. The truth is that even with the stress along the way and though I have been struggling at times to show it, I am grateful, and I am especially grateful for all of you who are supporting me and choosing to follow along with my journey.

Everything I’ve been counting down to and preparing for is about to begin, and as I go forward, I will keep repeating to myself, “Choose gratitude.”